It's the super highway to personal growth and you can be doing a dance party. By her definition, "mindfulness is being present to the moment with joy and ease." "Motherhood is like being on the highway. Tucker, however, lays it out in the most validating and real way I've ever heard. I've declared myself something of a mindfulness failure because I've thought that being cool, calm and collected at every turn was the goal. Here are some of my favorite takeaways: On mindfulnessįull disclosure: I taught yoga for over a decade and still bristle at what I've always thought of as "mindfulness." I've always struggled with being still and present, especially when I'm frustrated or challenged. (Even now that the kid who bit my butt is only five inches shorter than the average NBA player.) I may not have toddlers any longer but what I've learned from listening to the episode is still incredibly applicable. Her approach to navigating tantrums, and teaching both kids and parents to name and manage emotions is one that any caregiver can benefit from. Tucker is a positive parenting educator and the founder of Generation Mindful, a line of practical play-based tools and toys and a supportive parenting community. On a recent episode of The Motherly Podcast, Liz Tenety spoke with Suzanne Tucker.
#Generation mindful how to#
We're learning to manage our emotions so that we can teach our children how to manage theirs. Sure, there's the part where we raise good humans, but at the core of it, we're working on ourselves. Am I trying to do better? Always.Īnd that's what this parenting gig is all about. It was twelve years ago and I'm still making mistakes, managing the best I can at the moment and applying lessons learned for the next time. It was the best I could manage at the moment, and from that point forward, I vowed to do better. I admit it was not one of my finer parenting moments. There was definitely a very forceful slam of a car door and a momentary contemplation of dropping the kid off at the fire station and speeding off into the sunset. In fact, in this scenario, there was yelling (once we got outside). I may have given birth to two humans, but that fact alone doesn't flip a switch that magically turns me into someone who can be bitten on the rear at a gourmet grocery store by one of those humans (who was denied a cookie) and respond with grace.
Notice that the mind can perform its functions just fine without a self in charge.Even before words like virtual school, pandemic and social distancing became part of our daily lexicon, being a present and patient parent has been a tall order. While reading here, explore the sense of words comprehended without a self doing the comprehending. It may be a little hard to move back into the realm of verbal thought. Lack of understanding is also a primary cause of Anger.īuddha's Brain: The Practical Nueroscience of Happiness, Love. We don't have peace when fear is there, so it becomes the soil in which anger can grow. When we invite our seed of fear up like this, we will be better equipped to take care of our anger.
And then when it goes back down, it becomes smaller. We must invite it up to be recognized, to be embraced. We practice the Five Remembrances so that the seed of fear can circulate. My actions are the ground on which I stand.Įvery day we have to practice like this, taking a few moments to contemplate each exercise as we follow our breathing. I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. I come here empty-handed and I leave empty-handed.ĥ) My actions are my only true belongings. There is no way to escape being separated from them. I cannot escape dying.Ĥ) All that is dear to me and everyone I know are of the nature to change. I cannot escape ill-health.ģ) I am of the nature to die. I cannot escape old age.Ģ) I am of the nature to have ill-health. They are:ġ) I am of the nature to grow old. To help us identify, embrace, and look deeply at the seeds of fear, he offered us a practice called the Five Remembrances. The Buddha said that all of us have the seed of fear, but most of us suppress it and keep it locked in the dark. Book: Reconciliation: Healing the Inner Child